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“The Boss” vs A Leader

My Executive clients understand that developing their Leadership skill set is the most important factor for their ongoing and future success. Our initial sessions focus on unpacking the highlights of their journey to their current success and how their understanding of Leadership may have evolved along the way. A common theme often emerges out of these discussions that’s worth sharing here. Namely, the key differences between the “Leader OF” mindset vs the “Leader IN” mindset.

The smartest path that opens us up to better Leadership of people and projects is one where you search for opportunities to embody better qualities of Leadership IN your existing team or organizational leadership. In other words, from individuals to teams, and from projects to organizational outcomes, the key factor is consistent application of the Leadership IN mindset to your immediate challenges.

 There are several important distinctions to be made here between being a Leader OF (aka, The Boss) and being a Leader IN (a true Leader) your situation. For this short piece I’ll cover 3 ways that Leaders OF are more focused on themselves (and their image) while Leaders IN are more concerned with total team performance and their role in fostering it. Your total Leadership Effectiveness Quotient (LEQ) can be quickly improved to the degree that you can start to move the slider of your current Leadership style from the OF end towards the IN one.

 1)    The first one I’ll mention is the titular difference between “The Boss” and A Leader. Bosses aspire to Leadership through a “power over” mindset, and often imagine themselves as superior to their colleagues and teammates. They want to sit in the back, apart FROM the team, and crack the whip as needed to drive their teams forward. Leaders IN, on the other hand, understand the “power with” mindset and appreciate that the whole team’s concerted effort is what drives success. They want to be a part OF the team and often head to the front to articulate the vision, chart the course, and lead by example.

 2)    A second distinction between Leader OF and Leader In is the focus on external reference points like titles, degrees, or previous gigs. Leaders OF are the folks whose credibility comes from the plaque on their door or diploma on their wall. These are easy things to point to, so these Leaders often relate FROM them and utilize their titles and/or credentials as a crutch or shorthand when giving orders or articulating policy. Leaders IN may have these same external reference points but relate TO them very differently. These Leaders actively avoid games of title- and degree-dropping silliness and instead invest their energy in effectively communicating directives and talking through policy. Again, they understand that their responsibility to the team often comes down to effective communication of the Why’s and How’s of new directives, not just shouting out the What’s.

 3)    The final distinction I’ll share here is the different relationship to Challenge & Support that you’ll see in those that embody the Leader OF mindset vs those with Leader IN. Most Leaders OF provide a lot in terms of Challenge to their teams, but much less Support. For example, these folks shout a lot about margins, deadlines, and goals. But how often do they ask where they can provide Support in terms of clarification, prioritization, or task delegation?

 The greatest irony here is that these same people behave the EXACT OPPOSITE way when it comes to receiving Challenge & Support! These types of Leaders bristle when challenged on important specifics, policy issues, or even simple contradictions. Yet, when it comes to Support, they constantly ask for it in all kinds of ways - like requesting that the team stay late at the last minute, answer emails off hours, or take job-risking shortcuts. For example, these folks might announce “Looks like you’re staying late tonight!” at 4 pm on a Tuesday or “I expect a reply within the hour” to end an off-hour email.

 Leaders IN, on the other hand, do things 100% differently. They provide necessary Challenges to keep the team motivated and moving, and sterner direction as needed for lower performing members. However, these Challenges are almost always accompanied by some version of “what can I do to help you succeed here?” This explicit pivot to Support is what characterizes this Leadership style when it brings Challenge energy into play.

 And the same holds true for how they receive Challenge & Support. These Leaders are always seeking a better way of succeeding and actively solicit critical feedback. They know that they have blind spots, under-developed backhands, and areas where they can improve, and will often check in with trusted teammates for signs of slippage and progress here. When they do ask for Support, it is framed in language that understands the size and scope of what’s being asked, and appreciates the sacrifices that might be needed to accomplish it. They’ll say things like “This project is time-sensitive, can anybody stay a bit later this evening to help me get it out the door?” and will end that rare off-hour email with “No reply needed, just wanted to set this idea on your desk for tomorrow AM.”

 Regardless of your current position, these characteristics of Leadership IN your team, project, or division, etc. are all helpful examples of ways it’s possible to devote more constructive effort into helping your team succeed. And when it comes time for recognition or promotion, your name will end up higher on the list because of it.